tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post159570914513849452..comments2023-05-14T07:42:33.788-05:00Comments on Refining Our Craft: Slice of Life #17 - Playing with Fiction: Day 2Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-17041240427107626532012-03-17T23:02:41.331-05:002012-03-17T23:02:41.331-05:00I took the someone watching to be the man with the...I took the someone watching to be the man with the crossed arms.<br />A note about the leaves dancing. This means it is fall, is that the season you want? And the leaves sound happy. I often think when a story is placed in the fall it symbolizes death or decay. I think of fall leaves as crunchy. If they are dancing is it a windy day? If the older lady unsteady walking in the wind?<br />Oh, now I think it is the dog watching. He is taking care of the older lady.<br />I am curious what the conflict is in the story,and how it will get resolved. Who owns the dog? Why is the man with the crossed arms so mad. And what is the power the dog gives the woman?<br />I will come back :)PAMELA HODGEShttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00834410745679219203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-85377676529864374062012-03-17T22:42:34.098-05:002012-03-17T22:42:34.098-05:00I liked how you used color coding and your footnot...I liked how you used color coding and your footnote to capture your thinking in the process. While reading it seemed like you are enjoying the process of exploring fiction. What a fun way to slice!Amanda Villagómezhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02119297811490732509noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-40785849602076031772012-03-17T19:38:40.312-05:002012-03-17T19:38:40.312-05:00I was surprised to find that Jack was a dog. Your...I was surprised to find that Jack was a dog. Your story went into a place I didn't expect it to from yesterday - I can't believe how much it built up since yesterday and the plot is unfolding. Very intriguing. I want to know more about this man. Why is he so unhappy and what is his connection to the woman?Danahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18011661904689079860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-91445987304639962322012-03-17T16:37:42.687-05:002012-03-17T16:37:42.687-05:00I want to know why he takes care of everyone, espe...I want to know why he takes care of everyone, especially the woman, and who is the watcher really intrigues me. This is an interesting line: "The woman would feed the geese and pet him." Sounds like some kind of caring, but I don't know why. Very fun to read & see what questions my mind is forming. Clearly you have a mystery here-write on!Linda Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14983144542632353870noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-5979428718498491062012-03-17T15:16:03.417-05:002012-03-17T15:16:03.417-05:00". . . it's as if an eyelid came down to ...". . . it's as if an eyelid came down to signal the closing of the day" what a beautiful way to say it! <br />I need to know more about the man with the crossed arms, why are they crossed? Keep going you've got me hooked.elsiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01348895330633879894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-15148289462571747672012-03-17T14:49:39.861-05:002012-03-17T14:49:39.861-05:00Is Jack a dog?? I love this! And I love that you a...Is Jack a dog?? I love this! And I love that you are taking us on a journey with you through your thoughts as you write it. I'll be coming back for more!Kellylouhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05356654981279123538noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-85577893944154445432012-03-17T07:09:44.053-05:002012-03-17T07:09:44.053-05:00It is hard to reflect on your process but oh so wo...It is hard to reflect on your process but oh so worthwhile, don't you think? Your piece is freaking me out. Good thing the sun is coming out now :)<br />BonnieBKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07973593425566621090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1439886759698446010.post-90711580937644331752012-03-17T06:15:52.811-05:002012-03-17T06:15:52.811-05:00This is really good. I found myself wanting to re...This is really good. I found myself wanting to read more. I feel like the one watching is a ghost-someone from her past that she once loved, still loves. Perhaps her deceased husband, child, parent, sibling? Maybe this watcher doesn't realize they're dead. The only person that can see him, does only because, he can see ghosts. I sense he doesn't like this intruder? Not sure where you are going with this. These were my thoughts as I read your story. They may be very different from the direction you are going in. I hope you keep going with this. I can't wait to read what happens next.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02373919113998181845noreply@blogger.com